I'm building a home. Not a house of brick and mortor, dry wall and beams, but a home for our family that glorifies God. Our home is being built on a rock, Jesus is our corner stone, and our home is being pieced together day by day, hour by hour, and prayer by prayer.

"By wisdom a house is built,and by understanding it is established; by knowledge the rooms are filled with all precious and pleasant riches." Proverbs 24:3-4

Lately the Lord has placed a huge burden on my heart to be more intentional about our home, our children, my husband and most importantly my walk with Jesus. I have always been a sort of fly by the seat of my pants kind of person. I've had enough structure and organization in my life to look good and not be labeled a slob or a sluggard, but in reality that is what I am.

Most of my life I have been a very good deceiver, a liar with crafty ways of making it look like I've had it all together. The truth however is that there is usually a lot of chaos in my home, in my mind and in my heart.....and it is almost all a product of my poor planning and laziness. (Please don't post comments about this saying that you disagree and think that I'm great. I'm sharing my heart here, the truth, and what the Lord is working on within me right now so it's ok. I am actually happy to admit this because now that I've owned up to it and I am talking to Jesus about it, he's changing me.)

For a while the flexible Annie, fun-loving and easy going, sort of worked, sort of. But now that our family is growing and becoming increasingly more complicated I've noticed that I'm failing. I'm failing at being a wife who pursues her husband and gets to know what is going on in his heart and his head, instead just making sure the facade looks good, lunch packed, laundry done, dinner made etc.....and even with that I've been failing. I've been failing at being a mom who teaches well and loves well. I've been failing as a friend to those around me, thinking of myself before anyone else. And most of all, and most shameful of all, I have been failing as a worshiper of my sweet Jesus. I've made selfishness and comfort my God and put Jesus on the shelf along with a dusty bible and unprayed prayers.

So I'm building a home, a new home, and Jesus is my architect. The holy spirit has burdened my heart and my amazing Jesus, who forgives and gives grace abundantly, is saving me from myself...once again. He has taken this lazy, prideful failure and renewed me. He has given me a very strong desire to sluff off the lazy sluggard, the lying comfort seeker that I was, and work hard every day on my home and my family.

I have so much more to say about this, so much that I'm learning and I'm excited about but instead I'll leave you with this, think of it as the foundation. The cement has been poured and is hardening, becoming a solid foundation for my home and soon I'll begin to frame it.

"Prepare your work outside;get everything ready for yourself in the field,and after that build your house." Proverbs 24:27