I read this verse a couple nights ago and was reminded of how much we need Jesus. We are all corrupt and fall short of the glory of God.

I usually love verses about love and hope and peace but recently I am drawn to verses that highlight our failings and sin.

I spent so many years of my life thinking that I was a "good person" and therefore right in the eyes of God. Although this was just was a version of God I had manufactured to fit my needs and desires, not the true God, not the God of the bible, not Jesus.

Now however, I need to be reminded daily that I am a sinner who needs Jesus. I need to be humbled daily and forced to remember that there is no amount of good works that I can perform to earn my way into heaven. Jesus is the only way.

Please read this and cry along with me as you read.

Here's my favorite line from this blog post:

"This Jesus from the Bible is alive today…he is the most painful and comforting person I have ever encountered."

I just read this in the notes of my study bible. This note is commenting on a portion of the book of Lamentations (3:19-24) that has helped me through the day today and has been on my mind a lot lately.

"Belief in God's mercy & faithfulness is the key to a restored relationship with God."

That's all for tonight.

Ryan and I don't usually do much for Valentines day, we never really have, but I just remembered one from years ago that made me smile.

We were in college and I think it was probably our first Valentines day as a couple. We had agreed that neither of us really liked Valentines day all that much so gifts were not necessary. Maybe instead we'd just rent a movie or go for a walk and have coffee. I think I might have bought him a card and a box of heart shaped Altoids or something little like that, but Ryan was a far more thoughtful than I.....as is usually the case.

Earlier that week Ryan had recruited a buddy to help him pick through the QFC candy bin for all of the clear gummy bears they had. I had mentioned to Ryan early in our relationship that I love gummy bears but really just the clear ones...I think they're pineapple...and they have to be the kind that are a little though and chewy, not soft and gummy. I like them better when they're a little stale.

So low and behold, on Valentines day, Ryan presented me with a big bag of just clear gummy bears and a card. I love my husband.

The Lord has blessed me with some absolutely amazing friends, some good friends, and some friends that I call cartoon friends. I love all of my ladies (let's be honest I have no male friends unless they are married to one of my girlfriends or friends with my husband and are therefore a nice consolation) but I wish I knew them all better.

This verse has been running through my mind recently and has really pierced my heart and made me think about my ladies, specifically my cartoon ladies.

"Bear one anther's burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ." Galatians 6:2

My cartoon ladies are the friends who are always happy and who never seem to be phased by the brokenness of our world. I love these ladies and at times have seen the cracks in their veneer, but because they won't let me in, that's all I've ever seen. They won't share their pain or their suffering with me and all I can do is hope and pray that they are sharing it with someone.

I have a girlfriend who went through something terrible somewhat recently. Something happened to her that changed her life forever and broke her heart. Before this thing happened I would say that we were pretty good friends but I don't think I really knew her. We had laughed together and we had shared some secrets but until her heart was exposed and her junk was put out on the table in lots of tiny pieces, I didn't really know her.

I am sad for my friend who had to live through such a trial but I am so thankful that she did it with me and not alone. I am thankful that she let go of her cartoon facade and allowed me to see her garbage and her sin. Because we have weathered a storm together I feel closer to her than ever. She let me bear her burden too.

I understand that my relationship with each and every friend is going to be different. Not all of my relationships are going to be deep and meaningful but honestly, shouldn't they be, at least to a point?

If you are my friend, I want to know you and I want to be known by you too. I don't want to sit and have coffee and talk about babies or vacations or things every time. I want to talk about your heart and mine and expose my real self to you, the self that I try to hide because I'm afraid you won't like me anymore. I want to bear your burden, see the garbage you've been hiding and tell you that I still love you, no matter what's behind the closet door.

I am a sinner, you are a sinner and the only one who can save us from our sin, from hell, from ourselves, is Jesus. Jesus asks us to give our lives to Him and through his saving grace find forgiveness and solace in His arms; but this is not the end. Along with trusting the Lord with our sin and our brokenness we are supposed to be in community with others to live through our trials together. Supporting, loving and praying for one another.

If you are my friend I love you. If you're not my friend, I want you to be and I love you.